Just Dance 2024

I must say that it's an impressive number of Just Dance titles that Ubisoft has launched since the first game was released in 2009. With 14 installations and several spinoffs, I would say that it is one of the more persistent series to get an annual release. The fact that these are minimal upgrades that are introduced with each new instalment in the series, which might as well be expansions, is also something that we have had to get used to with this type of game, although I have definitely raised my eyebrows at this when I have been dancing away in Just Dance 2024 over the past few days.

Because even though I have not been a frequent follower of the series, it already strikes me when I am about to jam out to my first song that this could really be any part of the Just Dance series and certainly not necessarily the latest installation. Sure, the music library is full of brand new pop songs, but adding new content that doesn't require any new technology could have been done without making consumers pay £49 for a brand new game. I also react to the fact that a large part of the music is locked behind the Just Dance+ subscription that requires an additional influx of cash from those who want to take part in the full experience. The whole arrangement smells fishy and it seems that Ubisoft has shamelessly released a free live service game at full price.

So, to the actual thing: the dancing! Because once you've coughed up the cash for Just Dance 2024 and spent a little extra to get access to the entire game (until the subscription has to be renewed, of course), you're free to shake it to a pretty solid range of music. I find both classics like Holding Out For a Hero by Bonnie Tyler and a number of old Queen hits as well as a bunch of more modern songs like Loreen's Euphoria and Flowers by Miley Cyrus by quickly scanning the menus. I will admit that there is an awful lot of music in Just Dance 2024 that I have no idea what many of the songs are, but that just goes to show that there are songs for many different audiences to move their hips to.

I was quickly surprised that Ubisoft has chosen to remove all options for game controllers (except Joy-Cons for Nintendo Switch) and instead focus on making the player's smartphone the main tool for dancing. So after downloading the compatible app, I was ready for my first dance and was immediately thrown into the familiar Just Dance world where all the colours of the rainbow come together in a visual experience that strangely reminds me of what it would look like if Wii Fit met Summer of Love in a parallel dance dimension.

For those who are not familiar with Just Dance, it is basically about following the movements of your "coach" on the screen and collecting points by performing designed dance steps as well as possible. However, it quickly becomes clear how inadequate the system is because even before the music starts, I'm informed that I can only collect points with movements from my right arm as that's where I'm expected to hold the phone. Of course, I can dance as much as I want for fun, but it soon starts to feel a bit pointless that not all my graceful moves are counted in the score flow.

I also think that I'm rewarded a little too richly the times that I obviously dance so badly that no sane person could even call what I do dancing, which made me test the theory of how much impact my movements actually have. For a couple of songs, I simply chose to ignore all the prompts from the TV and instead bounce and spin around according to my own imagination and, not surprisingly, noticed how I managed to get about the same number of "Perfect!" and "Super!" ratings as when I followed the instructions. However, when I took it a step further and sat on the couch and aimlessly shook my phone during Zara Larsson's Can't Tame Her, the result was not as successful, although I still managed to get a solid two out of five stars. I'm not really surprised that a smartphone app can't map my movements to any great extent, but in a game that revolves entirely around dancing, I was hoping for more.

I also realised that my large Nokia screen would be a problem as soon as I was informed of the control scheme and I found myself clutching it desperately during all of my dance routines for fear of it flying out of my hand. Call me old-fashioned but jumping and twirling around with your mobile phone in your hand is not something I would ever consider a good idea and I can only imagine how many parents will have to witness their children's newly purchased iPhones whizzing through the air and crashing into the living room TV, followed by a shocked "oops". I rarely have anything good to say about the Switch's Joy-Cons, but at least the controls can be strapped around the wrists and therefore rarely become airborne. I myself unfortunately played Just Dance 2024 on PlayStation 5 and did not get the same luxury and can therefore really recommend you to choose Nintendo's alternative, if you want to throw yourself into Ubisoft's dance world.

For me, however, the last few days I've spent with Just Dance 2024 are enough to realise that it's not a game for me. Not because I dislike dancing, but simply because of the way Ubisoft has set up the game. Spending tons of cash (plus a little extra for the full experience) on a sequel that's almost identical to its predecessor doesn't send any good signals to begin with. To think that I should then risk the survival of my entire living room and mobile phone because there is no sensible way to read my movements, other than the associated app whose abilities can be compared to a half-blind gym teacher who awards points regardless of what I do or don't do, makes me prefer to dance without the game instead. Because it can be done. All you need is some music and you can dance as much as you want! You don't need Just Dance 2024 for that.